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Photos and memories

Its my day off. I wake up and the morning is full of possibilities. I could do something amazing today. I could meet the love of my life. I could achieve a personal goal. I could witness history. I wanted one of those days where you make memories that stay with you for the rest of your life.

I headed out for lunch with some friends, the sun was shining, and we walked past the abbey, laughing about random things. It was fab. Then someone mentioned last week. You know the one where I got completely drunk and ended up sleeping with one of the guys. I am trying to pretend to everyone that it is not a big deal, that it doesn’t matter, but it really does. It upsets me and I am not really sure why. Anyway my friends are cool, and I would make fun if it was one of them, but I just couldn’t handle it. So I said I needed to get some cash out, and I went home. I am such a wimp.

I spent the day watching twilight, doing a sit up every time Kristen Stuart came on the screen (so so so hot) and eating vegetable crisps. It was my parents anniversary so they came into town to have a meal, and I met up with them for a drink. PLEASE DEAR GOD DO NOT LET ME TURN INTO MY MOTHER. I love my mum, don’t get me wrong, but I can see my flaws in her. She had an argument with my brother while she was there, and it was crazy, it was like a movie was being played of me being mental, except it wasn’t me, it was my mum. I drank quickly to get over the awkwardness, two pints with them. When they left I joined my friend and his parents and drank some more. When his parents left, we continued to drink.

I was a hopeless flirt. I got called beautiful by this polish girl, my wingman said it was my way in, but I was so shocked by what she had said I could not speak. Then I was giving this other girl the eye, and she was with a lovely lesbian couple. However I overheard her conversation and she used the L word while talking about a guy. So when she was looking at me she was probably thinking ‘why the hell is this weird girl looking at me?’Hopeless should be my middle name.

On the way home me and my wingman had a chat. Turns out he is totally bisexual and he hasn’t told anyone about it. We had a heart to heart about life and stuff, it was really nice to be able to talk to someone about stuff like that. I also told him how much it bothered me that people talk about me and that guy. I really don’t know why it bothers me so much, but it does. We were walking home anyway, and then my wingman leans in and kisses me! Saying that he really likes me! I didn’t know what to do. I told him that he was my best friend and that I may have slept with a guy, but I am definitely gay. The kissing actually made me feel a bit sick.

Woke up this morning ten mins before work. Good job my boss text me offering me a lift else I would not have got up at all. So I didn’t meet the love of my life, I didn’t take any photos or achieve any personal goals. However I did have a good day, and my ex (who I am still completely in love with by the way) sent me a photo from last week. This one made me laugh; I am shaking hands with my new friend J